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6.11.08

Hanging...

in there...
I went to the school yesterday and have spoken to the counsellor who was on to is straight away. I love their school counsellor she seriously is one groovy chick who just meshes with the kids in an incredible way.
She was so fab in chatting to me as well, she told me that this isn't uncommon for girls of 7-8 to go through this..She said a lot of the time it can be a control thing, in the fact that there is something else going on in her life that she feels completely out of control with.
We *think* that she could be being bullied again :( that in itself breaks my heart...yes she is a full on kid, yes she has a bit of an attitude but my god this kid has so much spunk, I honestly really do have trouble being and staying angry with her there is just something about her.
Why hasn't she mentioned the bullying you ask? well we were asking the same thing but her counsellor explained it to me yesterday, Diva has a strong sense of justice about her but also a strong sense of loyalty too..so whether your her friend or not she will be loyal and has trouble letting people know that particular people are bullying her because she knows they will get in trouble...insert example A...yesterday one of her *friends* was being particulary mean to her but in a behind the teachers sneaky kinda way, Diva wouldn't tell, didnt want to tell but the teacher caught this other kid and told her off...Diva was devastated at the thought she had got this kid in to trouble..
Yes that's my crazy confused kid for you...so that's obviously something else we need to work on.
Hunk and I just feel kinda lost...he came home for lunch yesterday so we could talk about it some more and kinda nut out a game plan so to speak...and I was telling him that my chest hurts, hurts in a way that its been pummelled by something hard...
It hurts...a lot...my baby girl is hurting and Im hurting..
I feel like I need to rethink the way we have parented her for the last 7 years, did we miss something, was there a sign that she tried to show us that she was either being bullied or a sign that something was happening to completely shatter her self confidence..I'm so freakin lost about this right now..
But I cannot and will not fall apart on her...so I'm researching, I'm talking and Im getting some information and Im gonna sort this fucking thing out... Hunk and I are strong together, we really do make a good team...and we can get through this...she will be fine..and if I find out it's because she is getting bullied...I'm going postal on somebodys ass...

On another note...yes life still does go on around me despite my world feeling like it's falling apart...
How freaking cool that Obama was elected as US president??? Wooooo Hooooo yes I was excited ok? lol
Dont get me started on the imminent execution of the Bali bombers...I have very very mixed thoughts on that...Im just not sure that there execution is the right way to go...

Not much scrapping been happening lately...a little bit but not a lot...have been busy getting things sorted for Wicked Princesses..the response to our site has been amazing...Thankyou to everyone that buys our kits...we really do love that you are all loving them sick! We have an amazing design team now who are really showcasing our kits and their versatility...

and my exciting news???????/
I'm going to P!NK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am so freaking excited...couldn't breathe when I found out...because of some incredible awesome chick..I can go...I am so loving her sick!!!!!
Now I just have to wait till next year to go!! Hunk and I are going together and getting a nice hotel room, rockin out with P!NK and then will be home the next day!
Yes exciting!!!

I'll leave you with my layout for Stuck?! this week...of my beautiful beautiful girl who I am determined to make her realise how beautiful she is...

To all my girls..you know who you are that messaged me, called me etc yesterday...I love you for being concerned about us, it humbles me that people think that much of our little family...
You're all my rockstars!
Love T xoxox

5.11.08

Terrified....

"Diva, why aren't you eating? why is your lunch box still full?"
"I'm not hungry mum"
"But there must be a reason why you aren't hungry, your drink bottle is still full"
Yep this was my conversation with my 7 year old daughter last night at the table, after pushing and pushing a very angry little girl yells "Because I dont want to get fat"
I can taste vomit...I feel sick...omg she is only 7 why the hell would she be saying that....so we go along and talk about this, the whole time I am terrified, sick, terrified again I explain to her that in order for her heart to work ok and her organs and stuff she needs to eat and drink.. Her response? "But I just want to be middle size mum, I dont want to get fat" :(
This is so much bigger than me and my "I think I'm doing ok" mothering skills...

We do have a plan of attack so to speak...I'm organising outside help, this isnt something I can just sit back and think its a phase...if it is awesome, and i cant wait for it to end..if its not Im gonna need a whole lot of strength to get through this.

I'm terrified....